Okay. I’m going to dive into this next bit, but after this chapter, I promise it will get shorter. These first few chapters were just chalk-full of good things to remember.
It’s okay to be busy at times. You can’t love and serve others without giving of your time. So work hard; work long; work often. Just remember it’s not supposed to be about you. Feed people, not your pride.
Yeah. Good idea! In the third chapter, DeYoung talks about twelve types of pride that might lead to busyness, and if you’re like Michael and me, you’ll be hearing a description of yourself in almost all of them, if not every single one of them. So here are the summaries:
- People-pleasing. Saying yes to too many things and too many people because we fear disapproval, and feel like we have to meet expectations to earn their approval. Our goal is not to actually help people, but to be known as someone who helps people. He calls it narcissism, and it is.
- Pats on the back. Taking on too much so that you can be a hero.
- Performance Evaluation. “We assume, ‘If I don’t do this, no one will’…But the truth is, you’re only indispensable until you say no. You are unique. Your gifts are important. People love you. But you’re not irreplaceable.” (page 36)
- Possessions. “We work to earn and we earn to spend. We stay busy because we want more stuff.” (page 36)
- Proving myself. “..Ambition for our own glory must not be confused with ambition for God’s glory. Some of us never rest because we are still trying to prove something to our parents, our ex-girlfriend, or our high school coach.” (page 36).
- Pity. We want people to notice our busyness and feel bad for us. Because they will!
- Poor Planning. Being “too hesitant to hand over certain tasks to others..” and letting it wreak havoc on your schedule. (page 37).
- Power. The need to feel in control. (page 37)
- Perfectionism. The urge to make sure everything is perfect, or the fear of making a mistake. (page 37)
- Position. I’m supposed to be this busy because it’s my job. (page 37)
- Prestige. I’ll “get there” eventually if I work this hard. (page 37)
- Posting. We “need” to provide more information to people, or worry they’ll be concerned if we don’t. (page 37).
Can you relate to these?
This was a really helpful breakdown for the two of us as we thought about our busyness. It was a relieving thing to be able to identify the sin in our busyness. Picking apart our motivations helped us realize that a good portion of our busyness wasn’t actually benefitting others or ourselves in the long run, but was only serving to give us little booster shots of pride. It’s helped us to also think through things before we make a commitment: “Why are we going to say ‘yes’ to this invitation? Why are we planning this event? Why do we want to go do this extra little thing in our already packed day?”
I hope this is all helpful to whoever stumbles across this page. It’s helpful for me to write and be reminded of what we’ve studied and learned so far. Thanks for reading!